We in the financial media often write about companies that are involved in serious matters, both good and bad, and we often do so with a lightheartedness that suggests we are dispassionate or detached from such matters. This is understandable, since we are expected to provide unbiased forecasts of the performance of companies and stocks. We are allowed to hold and even communicate moral opinions, if we wish, but we must keep them very clearly distinct from our analyses. We cannot allow ourselves the indulgence of feeling first and thinking second.
Since I must maintain a degree of emotional remove from my subjects, it makes sense to adopt a tone of lightheartedness. So I often do, and so I shall today, even as I discuss companies doing their part to ensure that we continue to endure the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune until the hour of our naturally appointed end. The lighthearted writer’s response to absurdity, of course, is to provide mockery, thereby steering readers in another direction, and as suicide is a more a tragic absurdity than most, there is every reason to apply mockery wherever, to whomever, and to whatever degree it has been earned.
But before I go begin, let me attempt to dissuade you from reading further if you are seriously depressed today. If you are clinically depressed or just, for whatever reason, seriously unhappy with the state of the world, you’ll find no solutions here, just a few stock picks. Call this number, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, instead: 1-800-273-8255.
Remember to treat these investment ideas as just that, ideas, and do your own research before making any investment decision.